The lose of someone who changed my life..

There she is in the infamous poster. I had one, not only because she was strikingly beautiful . But she was what I thought I was supposed to be "a beautiful woman".
That's what I thought being gay was ..wanting to be the opposite gender. Nope I was just gay not transgendered . Either life is not what you want for yourself, but it comes with your spirit. We all have struggles , some excepted some not. She was a warrior for her life , as I am as we all are . Brightest Blessing Farrah this fight is over you can rest now.

Summer??????

I know we were supposed to have one , I think I may have slept through it. That's what its been like , I am always tired , general fatigue , blahs and yuks . I am working up to working out . We all know how that goes. Anyway I see my Primary Doctor on Friday , maybe there is an explanation? Until then smile and suck it up !

Brightest Blessings

Time heals all wounds

I am still feeling the after effects of the chemo on my liver. I, of course, figured that I would be able to jump right back on the bandwagon of life.......was I wrong. I still feel very exhausted when doing things.
I went to Gay Pride this past weekend, and then Newport the next day. After all that, I was down for 2 days, just tired and fluish. I have come to the conclusion that I have to take small steps to get myself back on track. Just walking the dog doesn't count ( he does, but the exercise doesn't).
Well now I am just taking my HIV meds, which would be like nothing normally, but I never had a great time dealing with those in the beginning, they made me very sick. So we shall see how this plays out. I have to start working out slowly. And now that I have gained all my weight back, I should eat better LOL.

Rehabilitation?

So it has been a few weeks now since I stopped the interferon and pegasis . I of course am the eternal optimist thinking I would instantly be me , active doing things making plans , meeting friends .Well my body proved me a fool , I suppose since being sick for so long it is normal not to zing it up right away .



So I guess its work out time and seriously folks its got to go slow . I spent a day in Newport with friends walking around and enjoying the beautiful sites . I was sore and extremely exhausted it took me 2 days to feel myself again . So moral of the story is after 48 weeks of battling this cancer , do not think its over once the last needle is injected. Eat , sleep and continue to work yourself up . Be well



Blessed be

Mariah sings again

Imperfect angel

Do I ? Can I ?

That's basically what this week was like . Sometimes I would feel ok but most of the week I was very fluish,fatigued just basically feeling like I have been all along. all the blood work is coming back very Steady . So I don't know , I can meditate and connect so that's all I am concerned with.



I at one point began to wonder if it isn't the HIV meds I take , I felt like that on those as well .



gay pride is this week , I wanted to volunteer but I don't think I can handle doing anything that is that fast paced and hectic I do not feel well enough for that . so i will watch from the sidelines and enjoy it that way , definitely next year. The outfit has changed several times , but my sister has made me a fantastic bracelet

I am so grateful...

That this treatment is over. A whole year, injecting and rejecting.....feeling so gross from Friday until Thursday just to do it all over again. But It is gone now........the dragon has been slayed.....for now . I am not sure of the return percentage as I am just grateful it's over for now. My dentist gave me some mouthwash to use ghlorhexidine gluconate, and I think it is interacting with one of my several hiv meds. Looks and feels like thrush.....I looked it up and I did not find any conflicts.

Well time to enjoy and focus onward I will keep writing as long as I still have something to say.

Blessed Be !!!